Cars, Assholes, School, LIFE

WARNING: This post contains language that is NSFM (not safe for moms) and graphic menstruation art.

• I am car shopping. I've had it with the Sube, and it's time for it to make penance for all the trouble (not to mention money it has cost us) it has given me. So during my perusing, I've noticed that there are about a 1,000,000 Chevy Cobalts available in this area and in my price range. There are two top reasons I'll never own a Chevy Cobalt.

1. I am pretty sure there's an explanation for the million or so Cobalts available to me; I'm also pretty sure I don't want to find out what that explanation is.
2. Chevy Cobalts are not cobalt, and I have a problem with that. Even the blue ones aren't cobalt. I won't purchase a liar car.

• We are entirely out of that shit hole, also called North Street. Here's a huge "fuck you" to our white-trash neighbors and their little shit kids and the jackasses who own/"maintain" that place. You had it easy with us. Oh, and karma is a boomerang.
• My summer classes are making things really hectic for me, but I am enjoying them. I evenlove one of them. Plus, I'm doing a project on menstruation which is pretty much as good as it gets for me.

There's more news, but I'm tired now. I'll try again soon. In the mean time, enjoy some menstruation art by Isa Sanz, via Museum of Menstruation and Women's Health.

Dear Pat Robertson

From the Minneapolis-St. Paul Star Tribune:

Dear Pat Robertson,

I know that you know that all press is good press, so I appreciate the shout-out. And you make God look like a big mean bully who kicks people when they are down, so I'm all over that action. But when you say that Haiti has made a pact with me, it is totally humiliating. I may be evil incarnate, but I'm no welcher.

The way you put it, making a deal with me leaves folks desperate and impoverished. Sure, in the afterlife, but when I strike bargains with people, they first get something here on earth -- glamour, beauty, talent, wealth, fame, glory, a golden fiddle. Those Haitians have nothing, and I mean nothing. And that was before the earthquake.

Haven't you seen "Crossroads"? Or "Damn Yankees"? If I had a thing going with Haiti, there'd be lots of banks, skyscrapers, SUVs, exclusive night clubs, Botox -- that kind of thing. An 80 percent poverty rate is so not my style. Nothing against it -- I'm just saying: Not how I roll.

You're doing great work, Pat, and I don't want to clip your wings -- just, come on, you're making me look bad. And not the good kind of bad. Keep blaming God. That's working. But leave me out of it, please. Or we may need to renegotiate your own contract.

Best, Satan

via NPR

image via Pat Robertson

p.s. On a humorous aside, when I ask blogger to tag my post with Pat Robertson, two options appear: "Pat Robertson Can Suck It" and "Pat Robertson Can Kiss My Ass." This dummy has been pissing me off for a while now....